Sources have said both of the stars' fiery personalities led to frequent fights and separations. But a source who knows the couple asserts that Martinez's temper was the last straw for Berry.
"Oliver comes from a world where he was easily intimidated by her ability to work and that she was the breadwinner. He was emasculated by her beauty and her power, and his temper could erupt," the source tells PEOPLE. "He was never physically abusive towards her. He was very possessive in a very kind of caveman way but was never abusive to her or the family."
The source adds: "He had an explosive temper in a way that was profoundly frightening. You never knew when he would explode."
A rep for Martinez did not respond to a request for comment.
Martinez, 49, has a history with violent altercations, including a 2012 Thanksgiving brawl with Berry's ex Gabriel Aubry – who is the father of her 7-year-old daughter, Nahla.
Currently, Martinez is in the middle of a $5 million lawsuit for allegedly shoving an empty car seat at a Los Angeles International Airport employee.
"Olivier has definite anger management issues. I think this was coming for a long time and [Berry was] not wanting to have to do this," the source says.
Martinez's "unpredictable temper" was the last straw, according to the insider.
"In any sort of situation, you never know what will get his temper up – and it's unnerving to live with that. Imagine that every single day."
The couple announced their divorce publicly on Tuesday, saying in a joint statement, "We move forward with love and respect for one another and the shared focus of what is best for our son."
Both are seeking joint custody of their 2-year-old son, Maceo-Robert.
According to court paperwork obtained by PEOPLE, Berry, 49, asks for no spousal support for either party, but Martinez has requested that issues of spousal support to be sorted out at a later date.
"She is sad, very sad," the source says. "This is never easy."
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